A Life of Gratitude

Mother’s Day is a day I cherish. I look at my children, the ones I get to hold, laugh with, and watch grow, and my heart fills with a joy so big it almost feels too much for one body to contain. Their presence is a gift I never take for granted. But there is another truth that lives quietly alongside that joy. A softer, more tender ache for the babies I carry only in my heart. The ones I never got to hold, but who shaped me just as deeply. On a day meant to celebrate motherhood, I feel both the fullness of what I have and the emptiness of what I've lost. For a long time, I thought these feelings contradicted each other. That if I felt sadness, it meant I wasn’t grateful enough. Or that acknowledging my grief would somehow dim the light of the children here with me. But I’ve learned that love doesn’t work that way. A mother’s heart is wide enough to hold both. So, if today you find yourself smiling through tears, or feeling joy wrapped in a layer of longing, you’re not alone. There ...

Some stories in Scripture don’t shout; they whisper. They slip quietly into the narrative, but if you lean in, they reveal the heart of God in a way that stops you in your tracks.  Mephibosheth’s story is one of those whispers. Long after the dust of battle had settled and Jonathan was gone, David remembered a covenant he had made with his best friend. He didn’t let that promise fade with time. Instead, t he King asked, “Is there no one still alive from the house of Saul to whom I can show God’s kindness?”  (2 Samuel 9:3) That question set everything in motion. It reached all the way to Lo‑Debar, a barren, forgotten place, where a disabled man lived in obscurity. Mephibosheth was lame in both feet and saw himself as a "dead dog," according to scripture. He needed kindness and provision, but he didn’t go looking for the king. The king went looking for him. Mephibosheth wasn’t summoned because he was impressive. He wasn’t chosen because he was useful. He wasn’t invited because ...

As I listened to my pastor talk about King David and Bathsheba’s story, a question rose up in me that I couldn’t shake: Was Bathsheba just collateral damage in King David's story? In 2 Samuel, David saw Bathsheba bathing from his rooftop and summoned her. She was taken by a king who held all the power and ended up pregnant. David tried to cover it up by bringing her husband, Uriah, home from battle. When that didn’t work, he arranged for Uriah to be killed. After Uriah’s death, David took Bathsheba as his wife, and their first child died as a consequence of David’s sin. The weight of David’s sin fell squarely on Bathsheba's life.  The Bible doesn't sanitize the fallout of sin. Instead, it exposes the deep impact sinful choices have on others. Bathsheba was used, her husband was killed, she was forced to marry the king, and on top of it all, she lost her child, all because of choices she didn’t make.  The Bible never blames her. It never even hints that she was at fault. Ins...

2025 was quite the year. Not tidy. Not simple. Not linear. It’s the kind of year that feels like three lifetimes stacked on top of each other. There was suffering, joy, exhaustion, miracles, growth, and God’s fingerprints everywhere. 2025, stretched me in ways I never imagined. It was a year that held both the deepest valleys and the most breathtaking mountaintops. This year my 11-year-old son was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes, and we came terrifyingly close to losing him. One moment I was lying in bed when I heard God tell me to take him to the hospital, and an hour later we were in a hospital room fighting for his life. The beeping monitors, the fear, the helplessness… those memories still sit close to the surface. We spent a week in the hospital with him, learning a new language of numbers, needles, and nonstop vigilance. And then, unbelievably, I spent another week in the hospital myself when my body rejected my new stimulator battery, sending me into emergency surgery. Tw...

Hebrews 5:8-9 (NLT) says,  "Even though Jesus was God’s Son, H e learned obedience from the things He suffered. In  this way, God qualified Him as a perfect High Priest, and He became the source of eternal salvation for all those who obey Him."  During my quiet time recently, I came across a passage that I've read many times, but  I as I read this time, I realized I had never noticed the power written in these words. The Passion Translation words it this way, " But even though He was a wonderful Son, He  learned to listen and  obey through all his sufferings.  And after being proven perfect in this way He has now become the source of eternal salvation to all those who listen to Him and obey." The Greek word for obedience is "hupakoe." It means to "listen to for the knock on the door" or "pay attention." So, this verse explains that the many ways Jesus suffered while He walked on the earth, were lessons of listening to and obeying Go...

It seems like just yesterday we were praying over the decision to homeschool our children. It didn't make a lot of sense in many ways, but we were obedient and said we would simply take it year by year. Here we are, twelve years later, all the curriculum has been completed, the requirements have been fulfilled, and today the boy who made me a homeschool mom will walk the stage in his cap and gown.  I know this milestone is difficult and complex for every parent, but I think it may hit a little differently for a homeschool mom. These years have been a journey of learning, growth, and connection for us both. I taught him to read, guided him through lessons tailored to his interests, and took him on every field trip to make learning hands-on. We've spent every day together as I did my best to nurture his confidence, correct his mistakes, and ensure he had the social experiences he needed. It hasn't been easy, but it has been so rewarding. Homeschooling has shaped both of us in...

"Then Moses told them, “Do not keep any of it until morning.” But some of them didn’t listen and kept some of it until morning. But by then it was full of maggots and had a terrible smell. Moses was very angry with them." Exodus 16:19-20 (NLT) I'm always amazed when reading the story of the Israelites being rescued from slavery in Egypt. God showed up in the most incredible ways for His people! Exodus chapter 15 begins with a song of praise to God for the deliverance He provided, but by the end of the chapter, the Israelites were already complaining. Can you believe it?  I think we are all like those Israelites to some degree. We witness God do incredible things for us and those around us, but then as soon as a problem arises or we become uncomfortable, we begin to doubt and complain, revealing our lack of trust in God. After much complaining, God provided fresh water, quail, and manna, which was a flaky substance that blanketed the ground each morning (Exodus 15:22-Exodu...

The names Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego typically go hand-in-hand with the image of a fiery furnace. However, I recently noticed a significant story about these men that I had never paid attention to before.  In Daniel 2 King Nebuchadnezzar had a dream that he desperately wanted someone to explain to him. He called the astrologers, sorcerers, magicians, and enchanters but none of them could help him. The king was so angry, he ordered that every wise man in Babylon be killed. Because of this order, soldiers were sent to kill Daniel and his friends because they were known to be wise. Daniel handled the situation with composure and calmness, requesting that the king give him the opportunity to explain the meaning of the dream. The king allowed it. Daniel 2:17-19 (NIV) says, " Then Daniel went home and told his friends Hananiah, Mishael, and Azariah what had happened.   He urged them to ask the God of heaven to show them His mercy by telling them the secret, so they would not be...

One of my favorite Christmas decorations is a nativity scene made in Italy in the 1940's. It belonged to my Great Grandmother, was passed down to my mother many years ago, and has since become part of the collection of decor my family puts out each December.  Knowing how old it is, and the sentimental value it holds, tempts me to make it an "adult hands only" decoration, but years ago I decided to allow my children to be "hands-on" with all of our nativity sets. It's a simple idea but I have always wanted to them to know that Jesus is never off limits to them.  So, with each of my four children, our nativity sets have been played with, and I've often found them in various interesting arrangements. A few days ago, I noticed the sweetest scene my daughter had set up with the figures. All of them, even the camels, cows, and sheep, we're placed in a circle surrounding Jesus. As soon as I saw this display, a thought entered my mind. Especially at Christma...

During Sunday's church service, I found myself kneeling at the altar with tears streaming down my face. As I poured my heart out to God about some difficult situations in my life, I began to feel guilty for begging God for help instead of worshipping Him. I started to scold myself for crying out to God instead of singing His praises, when I heard that sweet, still, small voice say, "Tears are worship, too."  As I've thought about those words, I was reminded of the story Jesus told in Luke 7:37-38. The Passion Translation tells it this way,  " In the neighborhood there was an immoral woman of the streets, known to all to be a prostitute. When she heard that Jesus was at Simeon’s house, she took an exquisite flask made from alabaster, filled  it with the most expensive perfume, went right into the home of the Jewish religious leader, and in front of all the guests, she knelt at the feet of Jesus.  Broken and weeping, she covered his feet with the tears that fell fr...

Several years ago, I was diagnosed with a rare autoimmune disorder called Ankylosing Spondylitis. As part of my treatment plan, I receive infusion therapy every six weeks. There have been many times over the years when my insurance has denied paying for the infusion for various reasons. Each time that happens, it causes a lot of issues for me physically including a very serious, painful eye condition that can lead to blindness.  On Thursday I received a letter in the mail from my insurance company saying they were no longer paying for my infusions. Immediate panic set in because my appointment was scheduled for today, Monday. That gave me one business day to figure out how to keep my appointment from being cancelled. One business day is typically not nearly enough time to get insurance to do anything. I began preparing myself for the possibility of not being able to get my infusion and therefore, enduring the painful results of that.  Late Thursday night I decided to stop fret...

This morning, I came downstairs and discovered my English Bulldog had been sick in the night. As a result, he was lying in a huge mess inside his crate. I felt so bad for him! I immediately let him out of the crate, began washing my pup, and cleaning up the mess. It was so bad that I had to take his crate outside and throw his bed away. As I was cleaning, I noticed my almost one-year-old dog cowering in fear. He was ashamed and afraid because of what he had done. I wasn't mad at him, and it broke my heart to watch him cower in fear. He doesn't normally cower because he doesn't have a reason to fear us. In fact, that puppy is perhaps the most loved, spoiled dog in the world! The fear he felt seemed almost instinctual, not something we've instilled.  As I scrubbed the floor and assured my dog that I wasn't angry at him, it occurred to me that we often respond the same way when we find ourselves sitting in a huge mess we've created. Regardless of what caused the si...

Each day before my family begins homeschooling, we spend time reading a family devotional and praying over various things. One morning I requested prayer over an upcoming weekend healing retreat, hosted by Not Forgotten Ministries twice a year. I asked for protection over the volunteers and the participants. I explained that the enemy always tries to distract, deter, and destroy before a retreat. My kids remembered specifically a time when I broke my foot just hours before leaving for  the retreat. We also discussed other attacks of the enemy our family and those who attend the retreat have experienced.   Evan, my twelve-year-old son, volunteered to pray over our retreat. As he prayed, he said, “God, please put Your angels around everyone going to the retreat. We know You don’t put holes in Your angels so with them all around, nothing can get through and nothing can touch anyone coming.” I was so touched by his prayer and his faith.  Adults often pray with a little “g...

Last week our van was stolen in the middle of the day, right in front of a busy bowling alley parking lot. As we realized our van was missing and dealt with all that followed, I experienced an array of feelings. I was angry, frustrated, and worried, but still had a very real feeling of peace and assurance that everything would be ok. Just a couple nights later the police called, telling me to come pick up our van. They said they "caught the thug who stole it" and that he was currently in holding. When I went to pick the van up, the officers said that without a doubt, this man would be going to prison. Not only did he commit grand larceny by stealing our van, but he also used our van to haul a plethora of other items he had stolen out of other cars and homes throughout 5 or 6 counties. They actually found our van while he was actively burglarizing another vehicle. As I drove home that night, I realized, I was literally taking back what the enemy had stolen! Then, it occurred t...

Have you ever felt distant from God? If so, you're not alone. I've experienced that feeling and over the past few weeks, several of my friends have expressed feeling that distance as well. Even David, a man after God's own heart, felt distant from the Lord at times. He actually expressed feeling far from God many times, one is recorded in Psalm 71:12 (NIV) which says, " Do not be far   from me, my God;  come quickly, God, to help   me." But David also writes in Psalm 16:8 (NLT), " I know the   Lord   is always with me.  I will not be shaken, for He is right beside me."  So, if David knows that God is always with him, why does he also often feel distant from Him? In David's life and in ours, feeling as though God is far away, could result from many things. Sometimes distance occurs when we're distracted, feeling overwhelmed by life, going through difficult times, not spending time in the Word or in prayer, isolating ourselves from like-minded peop...

While visiting Mount Vernon a few years ago, I was awestruck as I walked through the museum, observing how George Washington's life played out. One statue was engrained into my mind as I read the plaque alongside it. It told of a battle on July 9, 1755, during the French and Indian War. Colonel George Washington was only twenty-three years old but was an officer, riding on horseback, delivering orders to the troops. Out of eighty-six officers, Washington was the only one not shot down.  In a letter to his brother following the battle, George Washington wrote, "By the all-powerful dispensations of Providence, I have been protected beyond all human probability or expectation; for I had four bullets through my coat and two horses shot under me, yet I escaped unhurt, although death was leveling my companions on every side of me!" At his young age Washington had no idea what his future held but this battle confirmed God's call on his life. As we look back on history, we ca...

 A few months ago, my family attended a worship night at a local church. Throughout the evening the children were encouraged to draw pictures of what they believed God was showing them. Then the children laid all of their drawings at the altar. It was a really beautiful sight. My six-year-old daughter drew a picture of a heart and around it she wrote, "I am a child for God!" She wrote this entirely unprompted, by herself. I think she intended to write, "child of God," but as soon as I saw it, the word "for" really spoke to me.  We often hear that we are children of God, but how often do we think about being a child FOR Him? Without realizing it, I believe my daughter wrote the answer to a question so many people are continually asking themselves. That question is, "What is the purpose of my life?"  The purpose of life is pondered by everyone from time to time. We often receive deceptive and confusing answers to that question, though. The world wa...