Joy and Grief can Coexist

Mother’s Day is a day I cherish. I look at my children, the ones I get to hold, laugh with, and watch grow, and my heart fills with a joy so big it almost feels too much for one body to contain. Their presence is a gift I never take for granted.

But there is another truth that lives quietly alongside that joy. A softer, more tender ache for the babies I carry only in my heart. The ones I never got to hold, but who shaped me just as deeply. On a day meant to celebrate motherhood, I feel both the fullness of what I have and the emptiness of what I've lost.

For a long time, I thought these feelings contradicted each other. That if I felt sadness, it meant I wasn’t grateful enough. Or that acknowledging my grief would somehow dim the light of the children here with me. But I’ve learned that love doesn’t work that way. A mother’s heart is wide enough to hold both.

So, if today you find yourself smiling through tears, or feeling joy wrapped in a layer of longing, you’re not alone. There is nothing wrong with you. There is nothing to “fix.” You are simply living the truth that many mothers carry quietly: Joy and grief can coexist, and that both are expressions of love.

Wherever you find yourself this Mother’s Day, may you feel held in both your joy and your grief.

Tori